Forgive us for not posting for a couple of days. So glad Rudy’s Beat has some dedicated subscribers who get concerned when there’s no news. No big developments in Rudy’s condition. He’s had some fevers, indicative of infections common to such a long hospitalization. The fluid from his chest tube seems to be decreasing so that’s positive. For now, there haven’t been any major setbacks so that in itself is progress.
By definition a journey like this is disorienting. Life these past months has been dictated by circumstances we didn’t choose or plan for, so we’re always in a state of reacting. Over the long Thanksgiving holiday we were forced to slow down a bit and re-chart the course. As Trish mentioned on Thursday, my back has taken me out of things so it seems that no matter where she is, Trish has to deal with incapacitated bed-ridden babies. While I’m still uncomfortable, I am hoping that I’ve achieved the right balance of rest and medications that has me headed in the right direction.
We said good bye to Oma on Friday, who understandably had a tough time pulling herself away. It was such a blessing to have had her and Opa here for such a long time but, if we’re realistic about how far we have to go from here, there will no doubt be other places where we’ll need extended support.
Today is a beautiful Sunday in Santa Barbara and Trish and I are preparing for this week’s deployment. She’ll head back to Rudy this afternoon as it’s been killing us to be away from him for such a stretch.
This morning, I really am burdened for Wilson, Max and Olivia and what this process is asking of them. To make sure the next holiday doesn’t sneak up on us like Thanksgiving did, we took time yesterday to put up the Christmas tree and some decorations. While Olivia and Max got caught up in the moment and happily hung ornaments, Wilson had a hard time gearing up his enthusiasm as he realizes that, barring a rapid change, our Christmas will include time at UCLA. Wilson tends to foresee things a bit quicker than the younger two–he already knows we’ll say good bye to Mommy for the week when she leaves in about an hour and is brooding quietly around the house , while Livy and Max are still blissfully unaware as they swing from the avocado tree. They’ll compensate with a much more dramatic display when they see her getting into the car.
These are just some of the challenges that come with the reality we’re living under and, as Trish wrote Thursday, it helps us to focus on the thoughtful actions of people around us who carry us through. Sure, I would have loved a picture-perfect Thanksgiving with Rudy and extended family all under one roof, but just because it didn’t happen, I wouldn’t want to forget the thoughtfulness of others that was so present during our weekend:
For nurses who humored our constant calls to check on Rudy; for Kathy for sitting with Rudy yesterday when we couldn’ t be there; for neighbor Mike mowing my lawn; for friends like Katie and Brandon who invited Livy and Wilson over to play; for neighbor Eric playing catch with Max; for Greg and Kim having the kids over for fun play; for Noelle taking the kids to church; for the team of people who’ve taken slots to watch the kids after school each day of the week and for those who keep us well fed.
We echo our kids’ oft-expressed desire for life to return to “normal”, but in the absence of that, remain so grateful for the little things that make the disorientation bearable.
PS–I wonder how Greg Lawler survived before finding subjects as photogenic as our family. Wilson and Max think it’s pretty cool to be on the web. I’m just wondering why he hasn’t called me for a sitting yet.