A Gradual Fade

Our family had another special evening out last night ;)…Olivia was honored at the SBART annual awards ceremony as athlete of the year for girls lacrosse.  ‘Such a sweet affirmation and I’m so grateful for the positive year she’s having.  I pray all this goodness is seared into her heart (all the kids’ hearts frankly) and buoys that precious heart for a long while!  After a string of evening commitments, however, I’m glad we’re staying in tonight, I need to rest up before tomorrow’s big game!!  Ha, ha




The past couple of weeks have not only been an exercise in pacing myself physically, they’ve been an exercise in us pacing ourselves in midst of this disease as well.  I say “us” because, as you know, this is a team effort and the continual adjustments impact all involved in my care.  We’ve had a lot coming at us…more dr. appts than usual, the delivery of my breathing machine and not-so-smooth learning curve, the boys’ return and their adjustment to my greater dependency, my first cortisone shot to combat the tweaks that come with my continual loss of muscle, an increase in choking incidents, a brand new issue with pressure points and my losing the ability to lift a cup to take a drink depending on the time of day.  Frustration and irritability on my part seem to be on the rise too…understandable, no doubt, but certainly not optimal for all involved.  I so want to endure this journey with grace and dignity and patience…but sometimes that requires more energy than I can muster.  My frustration came to a head last night when I wanted to engage in a discussion with the kids about general life stuff and I just couldn’t…the brilliant insights 😉 are all there, what I lack is the ability to express them and that breaks my heart.  ‘Thousands of thoughts but only a few words.  Today I’m grieving all the things I feel I haven’t taught the kids yet…oh, I know, they’re smart and will figure life out beautifully, it’s just that we do life so well together and a big part of that for me has been the processing of life we’ve done together.  It’s one thing to fade from public life, it’s entirely different to feel like you’re fading from personal life.   How foreign it all is!

Ok, boo hoo, that’s enough.  I’m still praying for healing or a plateau or, better yet, Jesus’ second coming…join me?  Thanks friends!!!

My, Oh My!

This week has had so many fun thrills and it’s not over yet! The DP lady laxers pulled out a great win over Thatcher last Thursday to advance to the playoff semi finals!!!





After a late night of celebrating…well, late for a school night…Rolf hit the road by 5am the following morning to get to San Diego, get Max and his stuff loaded and back up to Azusa in time for Wilson’s baccalaureate.  It was a long day I couldn’t do but I’m grateful Rolf and Max managed to make it all happen seamlessly.IMG_3454

Saturday was graduation and we all headed down together that day!  Wilson graduated with a double major in History and Honors College.  He had a full plate the past four years with ROTC and his on campus involvement (ie chapel band)…his determination served him well and it was a gift to celebrate him…










Tuesday night was the semi finals game back at home against Valencia and, again, the girls emerged winners…



Greg captured a sweet shovel shot on goal by Olivia that left the Valencia defense scratching their heads a bit 😉





And Brooke had some amazing one-armed face-off saves like this one..so pretty to watch!


Another solid goal pic (thanks Greg).



A win so much sweeter with brothers home to cheer and share in the celebration!








The championship game is THIS Friday!!  Win or lose the season will be over and that makes my heart hurt.  I wish it weren’t ending but I guess it’s time to move past the spring season and on to whatever summer has in store.  Go get ’em girls!  Finish strong!!!



There is a lot of life being lived by the Geylings these days.  Max has a full week of finals, music juries, auditions for next year and packing during this last week on campus before summer break, Wilson finished up all his coursework and is reveling in all the senior fun to be had these last couple of days before his graduation and Olivia is play-off bound!  We’re hoping the girls advance on Thursday so the boys can come to the semi-finals next Tuesday :).  Olivia was given a special honor by the SB Athletic Round Table yesterday voting her as the female athlete of the week.






Again, her success is a reflection of her amazing team as a whole and we look forward to cheering on the DP Lady Laxers in the first play-off round at DP this Thursday, 6pm.

Wilson has had a full calendar of events including the Veterans’ Graduation Banquet and annual military ball…


Veterans’ Graduation Ceremony Comments

Wilson was awarded the saber at the ball for his leadership.

…and playing with kids on campus!  Ha, Ha




Awww, that warms my heart!

As for me and Rolf, we sit back and gleefully observe all the goings on.  Rolf works doubly hard to make sure I’m able to participate as I’m physically able and I’m forever grateful.  The weakness in my arms and trunk is growing as is my dependency on others.  😦   A trip to the pulmonologist last week revealed my need for some breathing support.  I’ll wait to share more once I receive the machine and am trained on how to use it.  It’s a disappointing development but there is far too much fun happening to be too melancholy about it.  We’ve got to strike while the iron is hot and embrace all there is to celebrate right now…so much to celebrate!



Quadruple Overtime!!!!

That’s right folks!  Yesterday’s game against Thatcher went into QUADRUPLE OVERTIME!!  It was another heart-stopping, nail-biting game…Thatcher started the game strong scoring two goals right off the bat.  DP fought back to tie it 2-2 and then the two engaged in a back and forth battle with DP pulling ahead at the end of the second half.  Thatcher got a shot on goal with 2.6 SECONDS left on the clock to tie it up 5-5 sending the game into  4 overtimes until Brooke Essig’s sudden death, game winning goal!  (PC Greg Lawler)

Livy’s approach…


1 of 4 goals for the day.


Brooke’s game winning goal!
Phew! A happy (albiet winded) celebration!


One thing that amazes me is the girls’ ability to keep their cool in tough games like this one…not something I seem to be able to do and I’m just sitting there!!!  😉  Well done League Champs!






A Night To Remember

To say that last night may have shaved a few months off my life would not be an exaggeration but OH. WAS. IT. WORTH. IT!!!  Not only was it DP GLAX’s last home game of the regular season AND Senior Night AND Olivia’s 100th Varsity Goal but it also included a nail-biter of a game that went into double overtime with friendly local rivals San Marcos!!  Oh my gosh.  SO FUN!!!!

This is a story better told in pictures and, lucky for us, Greg Lawler captured all the action!


7B1A5626San Marcos played a really strong game from the start and the SM defense targeted Olivia most of the game 🙂 …

…but she was able to score 3 times and this is the celebratory stick click after goal #100!




We’re not bitter or anything but Greg captured proof of a bad crease violation call that cost Brooke a key goal!  Look at her amazing foot placement (white cleats) outside the blue line  ! !  😉  Ha



Celebrating Sydney’s double OT, sudden death, game winning goooooooooooooooooal!








Celebrating with friends




The boys were close at heart as evidenced in the family text thread after the game!!!




My heart is full and I share in Olivia’s Insta-gratitude…



The girls have one more big game against Thatcher before play-offs.  Watching Livy and her team play is the highlight of my weekly routine right now…oh how I hate to see the regular season end…may they go far in the play-offs!

A Good Friday Experience

Ok, I know I’m over posting this week but I was really moved by the Good Friday service we went to last night and I wanted to record it here for future reference.  The service was personally significant because everyone in my family participated in it but me…Rolf was asked to share a reflection on a passage from Isaiah, Olivia sang and the boys were in charge of the “hammer” and bell percussion.  It wasn’t hard for me to feel a little left out at first (I’m finding that it isn’t hard to let go of things I no longer have the energy to do but it is difficult to no longer feel useful…especially in the areas where I had legitimate skill) but then my heart responded to the invitation to engage in what was happening and I was all in.  🙂  I know I’m going to want to reflect on it some more so I’m including my favorite parts below…you’re welcome to join me.  The videos aren’t much to look at so I recommend you find a comfy place to sit, dim the lights, close your eyes and soak it in…




The heaviness and sadness of Christ’s crucifixion continues today on this dark Saturday of the Christian calendar but the celebration of the resurrection is just hours away!!!  May the weight of all the sad and difficult things in life be lifted for us all as we get swept up in the joy and hope of Easter Sunday…and may we bask in a holy weightlessness for a long, long season to come!