Family Time

The California Geylings descended upon Kansas City this past weekend for my niece Emma’s wedding to Josh Mais.  It was an aMAISing wedding adventure and I’m so thankful our family was able to join in on the fun.  How do I sum up a weekend like we had?  It was, as all celebrations seem to be for me these days, so deeply bittersweet…so, SO fun to watch the kids enjoy time with their cousins and soak up all the laughter and shenanigans, so good that we scheduled an extra day to visit with my brother, sister-in-law and mom when the flurry of activity was over and so sweet to connect with their special peeps and my sis-in-law’s family that we’ve gotten to know over the years but the weekend was also bitterly painful and that was hard to face at times.

There was the obvious heartbreak…I can’t go to a bridal shower, wedding celebration or baby shower and not be overcome by waves of grief over the very real threat of missing out on such occasions for my own kids.  I think Rolf and I would be really good at hosting a wedding together and we’d be fun grandparents (if I do say so myself).  That is an ongoing heartbreak, for sure, but I was kind of surprised by how hard it was to be there and not be able to really participate…there was a day when I would have hopped to it and jumped in to lend a helping hand and would have enjoyed being a part of the logistics.  Instead, I was a spectator in every sense of the word and that felt really foreign.

There was also a moment after the ceremony when the extended Wilson family was called up for a group picture.  I stood up with support from my guys on either side and then had to hang tight for a minute while other shots were being taken.  At one point, the photographer looked back and saw me but assumed, I think, that I’d get out of his way as he hurried to get his shot.  I couldn’t move fast enough and he backed into me.  It was totally understandable and really not that big of a deal but the incident was an emotional trigger and my slow, slooooooow maneuvering into place for the family picture only accentuated me feeling like a huge elephant in the room and I started to cry…NOT helpful when about to take a picture!!  Yeah, didn’t see that coming either.

As Rolf, Olivia and I drove the boys to the airport for their return flight on Sunday, Wilson shared with us how he got emotional during the reception when Josh danced with his mom.  I was able to share that I could relate and how desperately I wish I could be present at future Geyling weddings and next generation celebrations but it dawned on me as we talked that there is comfort knowing that we have celebrated well as a family over the years.  There are no regrets there.  Whether simple or elaborate, celebrating life was something we valued as a young family and I know that my kids know what a passionate participant I’d be if I could by the many examples in our family history.  ‘Counting on memory serving us well in the future.

There was, however, a ton of fun that was had as well and here’s a look at some of it!  Rudy wasn’t far from our thoughts and ended up being a big part of an ongoing photo game we played throughout the weekend.  In case you missed it on social media, here’s our #lookingforlightning scavenger hunt…

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Looking for Lightning in LAX
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L4L reunited with the boys in Kansas City
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L4L with the cousins on wedding eve
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L4L dressed to impress
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L4L right before the kiss!!!
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L4L in the Wilson Family Pic…yes, Lightning is in there somewhere!!!
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L4L saying goodbye to the boys 😦
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Final L4L while eating frozen custard

Here are some other highlight moments…

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Slap a Joanie Cunningham perm on our girl and we could be twins! Ha Ha
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Breakfast with my cousin Becky and hubby Bill.
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My big bro Steve and Emma the bride.
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The kids and Grandma Jo
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Emma’s married!!!!

Uncle Rolf and Emma…then and now…oh my gosh, SO CUTE!!!!

 

 

 

 

We’re serious about our cousin traditions…

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Circa 2004
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Rudy was SO proud to be in the front of the line in 2014!  Ha Ha
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2017
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Cousin hubbies were included this year!  Ha Ha Ha, CLASSIC!

Family time.  Good time!

 

4 thoughts on “Family Time

  1. Precious Trish. Reading this post breaks my heart for you as you share the heartache that you experience, BUT you continue to go back to the positive side as you recount the wonderful times that you and your beautiful family have deliberately shared together. What a wonderful gift that you have concentrated on living your life with your family to THE FULLEST. You are a blessing to anyone & everyone who is fortunate enough have some connection to you – whether that be your family & closest friends or the stranger who is standing near enough to breath the same air you are breathing. Trish, you continue to bless me on a daily basis! I love you dearly and pray for you and your precious family! Melani

  2. So many tears here . . . all kinds of tears. Gratitude, tenderness, sadness, loss. SO grateful you could go. . . but I completely understand that feeling of isolation (because I feel it as an aging family member). But your sense of loneliness and standing-on-the-outside-looking-in is a million times heavier because of this damned diagnosis. And believe me, that word is carefully chosen.

    Kudos for going, for standing strong (with help!), for pushing through the pain, for encouraging your kids to let their own grief show. The more they can process as you move along this difficult road, the more fully they can deal with it all. How I wish NONE of you had to face into that truth . . . but . . . you do. You do. Lots of love to you, beautiful friend.

  3. I have followed your blog silently for a long time, “knowing” you and “knowing” Rudy has changed my life. Your words are heartbreaking but oh so inspiring. This blog is a beautiful gift to your family, so many more, and especially me. Thank you!

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