Be Still My Soul!

It’s so funny…on the drive down to L.A. this morning I listened to this hymn over and over thinking “I’m so thankful I’m at peace…things are looking good at UCLA…I’m going to pick up Rudyand get him home, YIPPY, etc, etc, etc”.  Then I walked into Rudy’s room and was met by the charge nurse with the news that Rudy needed to stay for another day of observation because of an episode that happened earlier.  “How could this be?  Rolf just talked to Nurse Courtney and all was ‘a go’!”.  BE STILL MY SOUL…I had to remind myself.  As it turned out, the episode was a particularly disturbing one and I don’t doubt keeping him an extra day was a wise move, it’s just that these curve balls always occur in the 11th hour forcing us to stay which puts Rudy at risk for catching another bug or spiking another fever…it can feel like a vicious cycle sometimes.  “Be still my soul…in every change, He faithful will remain”.

So, apparently this morning around 6:30am Rudy’s sats plunged into the 40s (not uncommon for him) and he became agitated (also not uncommon during his episodes).  The nurse called for help when his eyes rolled back in his head and Dr. Robert (who wasn’t attending on the PICU side but happened to be standing right outside Rudy’s room) responded to her call and began bagging Rudy when he didn’t detect any chest movement.  Ugh!  Now at first I wasn’t too concerned because the desats, agitation and even the eye rolling are all things we’ve seen before and from which he usually recovers pretty quick but the apparent lack of breathing is what concerned the team that rounded this morning and what dc’ed the plan for discharge.

In response, an echo and xray were ordered and both showed that the heart and lungs are clear so there really isn’t any explanation for the low oxygen sats.  From 10am-2pm Rudy sat-ed in the 30s and 40s pretty consistently by 6pm he was sat-ing in the mid-70s and there really wasn’t any difference in the way he looked from one to the other!!!  That’s what is so maddening about it…if it weren’t for the monitor, I wouldn’t know he was in dangerous territory!!!! 

So my prayer this evening is that Rudy’s numbers remain strong throughout the night, that no fever develops and that he will rest comfortably and soundly all night in preparation for discharge TOMORROW.  As of this afternoon, the team ordered to send Rudy home with oxygen.  Our discharge coordinator started working on getting it set up with our medical supply company right away so, prayerfully, the logisitics of all that won’t be what prevents us from going home tomorrow.  Once again, our family was pretty disappointed this afternoon and Rolf and I fear our words are starting to sound pretty empty to the older kids as our claims of “bringing Rudy home today” aren’t materializing.

Of course, watching the news all afternoon kept the goings on here at UCLA in perspective as I watched the community of Santa Barbara ablaze.  We are so grateful that our neighborhood and home aren’t threatened but many of our friends are being evacuated and our prayers are for the hundreds affected by this latest fire storm.  Thank you to the many who called or emailed concerned for our safety…please join us in praying for our community at large.

As always, we’ll keep you posted as tomorrow unfolds…thank you for your support and prayers through this last hospitalization…a harder adjustment after having the little monkey home for a couple of weeks!  🙂