Okay, today was tough…

Hello dear ones, 

How wonderful it has been to read all the comments made on Rudy’s Beat the past couple of days…it feels like we’ve been on this really wild ride but in slow motion since early Wednesday morning when I realized Rudy was on his way!  We’ve had 3 days of some amazing ups and downs and we’ve really only just begun this journey!  Your continued prayers and comments on the blog have been such an encouragement and fun distraction. 

Today, I admit, was the toughest so far.  Today was discharge day and even though I’ve known for quite some time that getting discharged with Rudy in arm was not going to be our reality, when the time came to officially “leave” the hospital without him, I was overwhelmed with grief.  I was given a mountain of pamphlets and brochures in my “postpartum packet” that didn’t apply to my situation and a sweet little diaper bag that was quickly emptied of all baby stuff by the lactation nurse and promptly filled with breast pump supplies and storage bottles.  Not that I blame the staff for doing their normal discharge routine, but every step of the procedure was a heavy reminder of the fact we weren’t going home but to a hotel room and we weren’t going home with Rudy.

Instead, I walked the long corridor from the maternity unit to the CTICU with my bags in hand to “set up shop” in Rudy’s room.  A bright spot in my day was getting to hold Rudy’s sweet little left foot that was now free of a monitor and tape.   Another truly bright spot was seeing Wilson, Max and Olivia who took a day off from school to meet their brother!  Their hugs never felt better and although seeing Rudy for the first time was a bit disturbing, they quickly warmed up to him and had a nice visit. 

And so, we enter a new phase in this journey…it’s a little hard to process it all right now so I’ll wait to share some of the details of Rudy’s condition and upcoming surgery on Monday at a later time but even in the midst of the grief and exhaustion, we continue to experience God’s amazing grace and are so grateful for His presence with us. 

8 thoughts on “Okay, today was tough…

  1. How vivid the thought of leaving without him – I will pray for that ache. And we give thanks along with you for all those great people there that are part of the answer to God’s peace beyond understanding (Phil 4). Peace to you dear Trish.

  2. Sweet daughter, how I wish I could “fix” everything so you and Rolf and the childrent would be spared this awesome anxiety. We treasure the blog updates and try to imagine what you are going through. The usual mountaintops and valleys will be a continuing adventure for all of you and we pray you can get rest and stamina soon.

    Knowing you, dear ones, you will try to do more than is necessary so please take every opportunity to take care of yourself.

    We phoned the kids last night and interrupted the movie they were watching to we kept it short. Helga said Livy warmed up to them after her initial anxiety when your friend dropped them off at the house. Livy’s reaction lasted on briefly–a la her preschool days it sounds like.

    Love to all, Mama

  3. Oh, my goodness! How beautifully our grandchildren photograph. We treasure these pictures. Rolf your stories are so helpful to us in trying to imagine what is going on there. We owe Bob and Cathy a big debt of gratitude for all they do and are to your family.

    Thanks, Bob and Cathy! And special “You’re the best” accolades to you, Rolf.

  4. Lisa just sent me the good news of Rudy’s arrival- somehow I missed the blog set up. Not sure where you are or how to reach you- cellphones don’t seem to work- so I will try this- love you all- please let me know if I can drive or hug or what-

  5. What an awesome photo of the kids! And oh how real this story resonates with me . . . Having so recently been there, my heart literally aches for you guys! Love you guys!

  6. Rolf and Trish,

    Just want you to know that we are thinking of you constantly and praying for you and Rudy. Thanks for all the updates. We love you guys and are here for you.
    Tom and Deb

  7. Oh Trish my heart is so with you in this. I love you so much and am praying for you in this journey. Rudy is a miracle and a gift from God. Many blessings my friend…

  8. Rolf and Trish it was so lovely to see you at the Italiano Bayou! You are such a blessing to all of us that are associated with the Rescue Mission! I have been praying for you and little Rudy, trusting the Lord that He will lay his healing hand on little Rudy and give the doctors the skill that they need in his surgery. Also, that the Lord will give you His peace during this difficult time.
    “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!

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